By Varan Satchi ’12, Commentary Editor and Tucker Iverson ’12, Humor Editor

10)  Tattoo the word “PROM?” to your chest (make sure to avoid specific names in case of rejection)

9)    Ask someone you’ve never met before with a morning meeting announcement

8 )   Shave it into Mr. Jacoby’s “beard”

7)    Make Mr. Scott ask (football uniform + eye black not optional)

6)    Get your mom to call theirs.

5)    Write it in kerosene in their front lawn.  Then light the kerosene on fire.

4)    Make up a rhyme that goes like this.  “Roses are red.  Violets are blue.  I like spaghetti.  Go to prom with me.” (60% of the time it works every time)

3)    Fake kidnap them, and then at the end when they think you’re about to shoot them, replace the bullet with confetti and “pop” the question. (NOTE: The Minuteman’s Mock Trial general counsel has advised us, to advise you, that an action like this, while amusing, is considered an offense in most states, including the District of Columbia. The Minuteman nor its subsidiaries take any responsibility for actions in conformity therewith item 3)

2)   Ask them 2 years in advance.

1)    Alex Liao still doesn’t have a date! (973 555 6462) Also, he has great listening skills, and genuinely likes you as a person.