By Bethany McHugh ’11,  Special Alumni Contributor

I’ve never been a person who embraced change. I cling to the past like a child clings to her mother’s hand on the first day of school. When faced with graduation from middle school, I was terrified. As I stand on the precipice of this new impending sayonara, I discover that again, I am terrified. In typical Bethany fashion, when asked to write about how it feels to be a senior for The Minuteman, I look to the past.

Four years ago, I graduated from Far Brook School, known by many as the farm school, “that creepy hippie cult”, and many other such flattering names.  I had been at the school for ten years so the idea of leaving was almost incomprehensible. All fourteen of my peers and I were asked to prepare a short graduation speech before performing our graduation play, The Tempest. Looking at the DVD of the performance, I chortled at the insane haircuts, the pitch of my male classmates’ voices, but as I watched, I realized that the difference between that graduation and this one is that I had closure when I finished my time at Far Brook. I decided then and there that I would take this opportunity to write my own graduation speech of sorts for Newark Academy in the form of a reflection for The Minuteman.

I would love to say that I immediately thought of a million things that have changed about me since I entered NA. I’ve lost some of the baby fat on my cheeks, and I’ve grown a little taller (two inches?) but looking beyond the physical, much of my essence is the same. When I first thought of this, I was disappointed. “Four years and nothing to show for it,” I thought to myself. Then, I remembered my last Creative Writing class.

Each senior was given a card signed by every member of the class. One of my classmates wrote: “You have definitely always been a role model to me and countless other people. Keep pursuing what you love.” I had honestly never thought of myself as a role model. For the last year, I have been so worried about colleges and schoolwork and my social life that I had forgotten that, as a freshman, I had looked up to the seniors and aspired to be like them one day. Truth be told, those seniors probably didn’t consider themselves role models, either. Back then, I most admired the upperclassmen who appeared to be passionate about something – whether performing, politics, or sports; it wasn’t so much what engaged them as that they were so thoroughly invested in something. As I look back at my high school career, I realize that I’ve found my passions, too. I feel proud of what I have accomplished and the small part I may have played in helping people like me realize that they can do what they love.

All that being said, I still can’t tell you who I was four years ago, who I am now, or who I will be in the future. I still can’t pinpoint any radical changes that have occurred in me, but that seems less discouraging now. I know that I’ve grown up in innumerable, but subtle ways during the past four years, and I’m so glad that I was able to start the journey of finding who I am at Newark Academy.