By Gregory Alfredo Ruda ’13

Newark Academy prides itself on great athletics.  Our soccer team beat Montclair in the Essex County tournament, our basketball team conquered the Cougars…

However, there is a rising demand for the introduction of new sports, namely bocce ball, rodeo, and badminton.  In this article I will analyze the possibility of these sports coming to Newark Academy.

Bocce Ball

Bocce ball is an age-old game known for its high intensity.  Bocce (Italian) roughly translates to “Overweight middle aged Italian butcher.”  During the 13^th century, Italian fry butchers would go out and play bocce ball in between slaughtering deer.  Could this sport be introduced to Newark Academy?

Obviously adding a bocce ball team is pretty high on the administration’s minds, but what they worry about is whether or not the Newark Academy athletes could handle the physical toll that would be required.  Local schools have good bocce ball clubs, but the price is steep in keeping up a team. Xavier Prendes, grade 12, is a world renewed bocce ballist outside of the school (who boasts 4 Buttermilk Tournament B victories).  He provides the bocce ball scoop,’’ bocce ballers have to work out constantly to maintain bocce ball form.  If you’re not 6-5, can’t bench press 220 and can’t run a 4.3 40, you don’t belong in the bocce ball rink.”

Will it happen?  Obviously everyone wants a team, but the administration just worries about the health of its students, and probably will not approve the hazardous sport that is Bocce Ball.

Verdict: Doubtful.

Rodeo

Rodeo is a lock for the 2013 school year.  What the administration hasn’t told you is that new turf field they are really building is actually an enormous rodeo stadium with bullpens, Texas wiener dog stands, and space for 400,000 RVs.  The soccer and football teams will be playing their games in the Arts Courtyard, as Rodeo looks to take over the fields every night.  According to experts Rodeo will take over Strategic Gaming Forum as the most popular Newark Academy extracurricular activity.

Young Republicans club has strongly endorsed the new stadium, contributing over 800,000 dollars for labor fees.  Young Republicans president Nate Feinburg has said,’’ we are trying to get the Wyoming Demographic to support the club in promoting rodeo.”  (Wyoming native Nick Martino has yet to endorse the club, nor has any member of the NA community).  But get ready Newark Academy community, because Rodeo is coming to Newark Academy in 2013!

Verdict: Absolutely, yes.

Badminton

What comes to mind when you think of a cool NA team?  Soccer?  Tennis? Football?  Wrong! Badminton should come to mind.  Invented in Vietnamese Opium dens, Badminton is a fun sport based on strategy and instincts and is on the rise in America as a popular sport!  Based on a poll on March 3^rd, 2009, Badminton is American youth’s 137^th favorite sport, bumping up from the 140^th spot they’ve held for the last 30 years.  Barely trailing lawnmower polo for that ideal 136^th spot, badminton is becoming mainstream.

But why should we play badminton at Newark Academy?  Ned Harwood has said,’’ Badminton teaches strength and commitment.  I mean look at Michael B. Jordan from Turkmenistan.  He’s an iconic role model, and has some physics-defying highlight reels.”  Hopefully the community will embrace a sport that is truly trending (alliteration) in the world right now.

Verdict: Up in the air (like a birdie… the badminton equipment… not the  feathered, winged, bipedal, endothermic, egg-laying, vertebrate animals… but also like those)

What is to come for the future? There are sure to be exhilarating athletic changes down the road. If you want to plead your case for any of these sports you should get involved in the school debate (located in one of the 40s every Wednesday).  But if you just want to get more involved in the games, check them out on ESPN 8 “The Ocho” where if its almost a sport, they’ve got it covered.

P.S. I can’t believe its spelled Badminton…..