By Sanya Bery ’17, Humor Editor

1. He has a long neck.

2. He doesn’t have a finsta with a dumb username where he posts things like this:

3. Instead, he has a rinsta where he tells us things we need to know like this:

            (also look at that follower-to-following ratio)

4. He doesn’t get texts like these from his mother:

5. He would able to finish this list.