By Sanya Bery ’17, Section Editor

Since this is my last article for the humor section and I’ve done such a good job, I wanted to make sure I was leaving the newspaper in good hands. I decided to reach out to all the junior humor editors to make sure that they were smart enough to take my place.

I asked them each the same question, “When was the last time you cried and why?” Their answers are below. I have decided to use this question to decide who would be best fit to take my place as humor editor next year because that’s exactly how the editorial process works.

Ben Leit: “The most recent time I cried was just last week, on Friday I think. I was finally getting into a hot, foamy tub with a glass of expired milk after a long week on my feet, and as soon as I lifted my foot off the ground to get in, I slipped on the wet tile and fell, shattering the glass and covering myself in what may as well have been cottage cheese. Then, I just laid on the floor and silently wept, not only due to the loss of my beverage, but because I was feeling overwhelmed with my hectic and stressful life. I laid there on the cold floor for a solid twenty, thirty minutes, until I fell asleep. The next day, in order to console myself, I went to the chiropractor and then ate crickets in the back of PetSmart.”

Tyler Mudge: *simply said nothing but forwarded me the trailer for Diary of a Wimpy Kid 3*

Jake McEvoy: “The last time I cried was actually the previous humor set: when I was told I was not funny. I’ll never forget it. That’s why I’m not coming back next year. I’m moving to arts. At least they want me.”

Danny Lifson: Sent me an extremely long paragraph but it got censored and then started a full on battle with the editors-in-chief which resulted in his deciding to make his own underground newspaper.

Benjy: *did not respond since he was removed from the group chat with all the humor writers and no one seemed to care enough to add him back*

Through this question, all these candidates have shown me that they have the ability to do as well as I did – if not better.