Teddy McGraw ‘20 and Michael Wang ‘20, Humor Writers

Dear Diary,

Times are getting rough. The future is no longer bright. Our numbers are diminishing by the year. All we have left is the class of 2019, 2020, and 2021. Soon we will be outnumbered, and eventually extinguished.

Back in the olden days, we used to fit three grades in what is now called “The Physics Hallway.” Yeah, it was a tight fit, but community was what we valued. When one person got sick, we all got sick. But it was all about the experience of being in it together. It also was not as tidy and pristine as it is today. Back then our hallway was dark and musty and full of Ms. T’s crickets and cockroaches. And that new and clean thing they call “College Office” used to be our Middle School Office where we put our blood, sweat, and tears every time we begged for extensions and curves on assessments. We used to fit 20 people into a tiny little closet called the “chess room.” Those were the good days. What happened?

Ever since they decided to build that new Middle School building the world around us old timers took a drastic turn. We are surrounded by a newer generation that is simply different in nature: smarter, faster, smaller. They clog the hallways with their crowds, they impatiently bull-rush the cafeteria at 11:40 every day, and they scream and shout in the L. Overall, they are a nuisance. What has our beautiful community come to?!?!

Even the academic world is different. We were raised through the holy Middle School Skills Tree that mapped out all of the keys to success and gave us a track to follow. Nowadays, they have this bland red and black poster labeled “Middle School Skills Chart”. Ew. What type of nonsense is that? No wonder why these youngins all come into the Upper School are uncivilized and block the hallway behind the library. Did you know that they also have a whole floor for the 6th grade in that new building? With televisions? And their own common space? ABSURD!

What hurts the most is not the transformation of our Middle School Hallway or the repurposing of our Middle School Office; it was seeing our Common Room torn to shreds, just so we can fit the larger new Middle School classes in the Dining Hall. OH COME ON! When will it stop? The administration shows no mercy towards us oldies. They are the asteroid to us old dinosaurs. WE HAVE CULTURE AND THEY DON’T! That room was our sanctuary. There is not a thing in the world that you can name that did not happen there.

Boy, am I shedding some serious tears writing this right now. What will this school be like after the Class of 2020 graduates? There will be no one left to tell the story of us Old Middle Schoolers. Are we just going to be cut from the history textbooks? Who’s going to remember us? If someone ever finds this diary entry, remind those newbies what Middle School used to be like…and how we bred nothing but pure success.

Love,

Anonymous Old Middle Schooler