By Anna Hope Emerson ’16, Staff Writer

“A friend is the gold of childhood”. These were the words of Dr. Michael Thompson, when he visited the 6^th, 7^th, 8^th, and 9^th grades last month to share his wisdom concerning the turbulent times of adolescence.

Dr. Thompson began his career as a teacher.  Over his three years teaching, he realized that he was especially interested in helping the “angry” kids, whom he defined as those with situations that involved depression, behavioral problems or troubled homes. This desire to learn and help struggling young teenagers led him to spend 35 years interviewing children, parents, and teachers in order to further understand the complex social lives of adolescents.

Dr. Thompson focused on two main topics during his presentation: friendship and popularity. He started an active discussion with the audience to explore two questions: “What is a friend?” and “What determines someone’s popularity?” Over the course of two engaging discussions, a variety of answers were presented and argued.  In general, the audience agreed that a friend is someone who is loyal, honest, trusting, caring, respectful, and fun.  The consensus on popularity was that it varies from boys and girls. The audience determined that popularity for girls was defined by personality and appearance, and that popularity for boys was more a function of humor and athleticism.

Once the audience had answered both questions to the best of their ability, Dr. Thompson supplemented the answers with his knowledge and research. He defined a friend as someone who is affectionate and reliable. His views concerning popularity were similar to the audience, agreeing that it is different for boys and girls.  His studies reveal that middle school popularity is mostly determined by looks, fashion, and charisma for girls, while humor, athleticism, and height are the important factors for boys.

Thompson continued by saying that in an average middle school grade, approximately 15% of the students can be classified as “rejected”. It is this 15% that are often traumatized and bullied in school. He only briefly addressed the issue of bullying, but made the point that the most important thing that helps children through bullying is friendship, and having someone that will stand by them.

According to Mr. Ashburn, the Middle School president, Dr. Thompson was not specifically chosen to come and speak at the Academy. “NAPA joined a group called Common Ground, which brings different speakers to a group of various independent schools. When we signed up, Mr. Thompson was already on the docket. After we found out he would be speaking here, we decided on the two topics that he should focus on.” It was decided that the 9^th grade should hear Mr. Thompson speak along with the Middle School, because, reasoned Mr. Ashburn, “keeping the value of friendship in mind is important when making new friends and assimilating with all of the new students.”

The young Newark Academy community’s reaction to Dr. Thompson’s presentation was mostly positive. Sam Rollenhagen ’16, said “I thought that he made his presentation very engaging. I liked how he provided the guidelines and the structure for our discussion, but let the students come up with all the answers, and then supported their answers with research. It was clear that he knew a lot about his topic.” At the same time, however, some students were doubtful as to the necessity of the presentation. Catherine Benoit ’17 said, “I thought his presentation was meaningful because it got people talking about two less well-addressed topics, although I do not think that popularity and friendship are problems at our school.”

All in all, the community was intrigued by Dr. Thompson’s thought-provoking material, and the very open way in which he presented it. The positive reaction to this presentation bodes well for the rest of the “Common Ground” series.