By Erin Mooney ’16, Humor Staff Writer

Taylor Smith: Girls basketball had a game this weekend. We won the state finals against Shabazz 75-10 and qualified to go to the Olympics so come out and support.

Eric Szlosek: Unfortunately men’s basketball lost a close game to Livingston this weekend but this Friday at 7 we’re having a huge game against our rival school MKA. It’s gonna be a white out so make sure you wear white. The event, along with a “White Out How-To” are on Facebook. We’ll also be selling t-shirts, giving out free puppies and candy, and after the game there will be fireworks so come out and support.

Mr. Gilbreath: (approaches microphone) Yeah just a follow up on that announcement, it’s gonna be huge. I wanna see the entire Red Army there to support our team. Make sure to bring your phones so that you can keep tweeting #NAChallenge. Free puppies. Free candy. Buy a t-shirt. White out. Friday. 7. #NAChallenge. Thank you. #NAChallenge

Nate Tsmikas: inaudible

Team Captain: Ok so um we had a game on Thursday against Summit – I mean we had a game against Governor Livingston and we won 4-1. No, we lost 1-4. No we tied 4-4. We have another game on um Wednesday? Against um…I don’t remember but it’s home-

Person in Audience: (yelling) Away!

Team Captain: Oh where is it?

Person in Audience: (yelling) Summit!

Team Captain: Ok so it’s away at Summit on Tuesday – I mean Wednesday at 4 so come out and support.

Club Leader: Okay, so I know we haven’t had a club meeting all year, but there’s going to be a meeting this Thursday in one of the forties to take our yearbook photo and talk about leadership next year. So you need to be there if you want to have leadership next year.

Team Captain for a sport next season: Anyone who’s interested in playing this spring please come see me after morning meeting wherever Dr. D puts us so I can get your name down.

Dr. D: Actually, I don’t think we’re gonna have time for that this morning.

Captain: Oh, so then um meet at the senior corridor at 2:30?

Dr. D: There are already 3 groups there at 2:30; pick somewhere else.

Captain: Okay, one of the forties?

Dr. D: There will be IB testing in the arts wing; pick somewhere else.

Captain: Okay, meet in the cafeteria?

Dr. D: There is SCEEP tutoring in the cafeteria today.

Captain: Okay, we’ll meet another day thanks.

Ms. Brodie: Recites all the lyrics to “Dream On” by Aerosmith.

Bill Ulrich: Makes announcement for lacrosse, swimming, outdoors club, does World News Minute (but lasts 10 minutes), brings back fact of the week, and surprise! Honor Council!

Sydney Mann: Okay seniors, none of you have handed in anything for the yearbook, and that’s due this Friday so please get those in. On a separate note: Diminuendo, if you want to apply for leadership next year please see me, Esther, Zoe, Mr. Scerra, or Mr. Lal. On a similar note, diminuendo has a rehearsal on Tuesday at 6. On the same note, morning meeting is in the hands of Diminuendo:

Diminuendo performs the current #1 song on lite.fm

Mr. Austin: Takes glasses on and off repeatedly. Well that was a rousing performance. Here’s Hannah.

Hannah Zack: On behalf of School Council I would like to thank you all for coming out to support your school this weekend. There are a lot of fun activities coming up later this semester so get excited. Freshmen are dismissed.

The senior class is outraged at their not being dismissed first and starts a fire. As a result, morning meetings are cancelled forever.