Author: Tucker Iverson
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Humor Intro III
G & T (Who came up with “&”? and why wasn’t the word “and” good enough for them?) [vimeo 29819197]
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Newarkacademydictionary.com
By Tucker Iverson ’12 and Greg Ruda ’13, Humor Editors Senior Corridor n. A place where backpacks can be free from the tyrannical dean. Example: Backpack 1: Hooray! I’ve escaped the “L” I can now be free from capture and torture. Backpack 2: I never feel safe. Backpack 3: I didn’t know we could talk……
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My Summer Vacation
By Tucker Iverson ’12, Journalist, Lover & Freedom Fighter Invariably, in the mystical journey along the path that we call life, one experiences a multitude, nay a veritable plethora, nay a vast cornucopia of happenings throughout their short walk. Being one of the “ones,” I too have encountered things. These are things beyond your wildest…
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Meet the Humor Staff!!
We here at the newspaper thought it would be an excellent idea for you to meet some of the wondrous specimens that write for this newspaper…specifically for the humor section. Most are attractive. Enjoy. Jeff Peng Pardon me while I finish my 200thpull-up. My chief, Tucker Iverson, just sprung this assignment on me in the…
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The 10 Best Things About Newark Academy
By Molly Alter ’12 and Gracie McNeely ’12, Staff Writers 10) When you say goodbye to a teacher and then pull up next to them, waiting for the traffic light. 9) When the fire alarm goes off and the emergency exit is the construction site. 8 ) When you walk into the ILC and notice…
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France, a Study
By Joe DeNoon, Le Staff Writer As many of you may know, Christopher Paolini recently left the halls of Newark Academy for the frozen wasteland that is France. He recently contacted me, and spoke of how truly different the country was compared to our own. To prove his point, he sent back some pictures he…
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Sensei Phoebe
By Sensei Phoebe Feinberg, Blackbelt and Fortune Cookie Collector It is better to go thirsty than to drink from a cup of mediocrity, but even worse is to drink from a cup of regular iced tea labeled “Arnold Palmer”.-Phoebe Proverb When the world asks, “Who is without a flaw?” raise your hand and stand up…
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Humor Intro…Dos
From the Desk of the Humor Editors (Yes, they gave us our own desk…but it’s outside…and it’s really a picnic table…and they didn’t even give it to us…) [vimeo 24544732 nolink]
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The Shocking History of Panic Switch (Greg Ruda Tells It All)
By Greg Ruda ’13, Humor Editor Editor’s Note: The following is an exposé on the history of the famed band Panic Switch. This story has never been told outside of a remote teashop in the Himalayas, and should definitely be disclosed to anyone over the age of 103, as it may cause instant youth, with…
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Top Ten Best Excuses For Being Late
By Andrew Brummer ’12, Staff Writer & Tucker Iverson ’12, Humor Editor 10) Abducted by aliens. 9) Was inspired by Ferris Bueller…but then changed my mind. 8 ) Thought it was a snow day until I looked out the window. 7) Drove to the city of Newark. 6) Flash mob practice. 5) Got in a…